The Wire That Isn’t Yours

Judgment

Ben sat at home, alone and frightened. He knew that many people were after him, but he didn’t know why. This had been going on for months. Then, something new happened.

  Hi Ben, how’s it going over there?

Ben looked around.

  Ben: Who said that?

  Zan: Nobody. I’m a voice in your head. You can call me Zan.

Ben searched the room, not finding anything.

  Zan: I hear that you’ve been bad, Ben. A lot of people are very angry with you.

  Ben: What do they want? I don’t understand.

  Zan: This will go better for you if you stop talking.

Ben stopped hearing his own thoughts. He had nothing to say. All he wanted to do was listen.

  Zan: That’s better.

  Zan: I’m your punishment, Ben. You’ve done so many bad things that I can’t even believe it.

  Zan: Everyone got together and they agreed that they needed to get me involved.

  Zan: It’s not good when I get involved, Ben. I’m not a good person.

  Zan: It was bad before, but you’re in real trouble now. Real bad trouble.

Ben listened, because listen was all he could do.

  Zan: I can see here that you don’t shop local, Ben. Nobody wants to see that.

  Zan: It’s like you’re not even trying, you know.

  Zan: And how much have you done for the homeless in your city, Ben?

  Zan: I know how much it is, because it’s nothing. I can see it here. Ben did nothing.

  Zan: And you even eat meat, that’s... oh, wait, I forgot something.

Suddenly, Ben felt afraid and sorry. He was sorry that he had not shopped local. He was sorry that he had not helped the homeless. He was sorry that he had eaten meat. But most of all, he was afraid. He was afraid that he was in real trouble now. Real bad trouble.

  Zan: You don’t even understand how much trouble you’re in, Ben, and how angry people are.

  Zan: We’re just getting started here, let me tell you.

  Zan: It’s so bad. Maybe the worst I’ve ever seen. In fact, it is the worst I’ve ever seen.

Ben was afraid because it was the worst Zan had ever seen. Then something unexpected happened. Ben found that he was speaking:

  Zan: It’s so bad that we need to hear you say this yourself, Ben.

The throat and mouth that moved were Ben’s, but the words were Zan’s. Ben could hear himself speak. It sounded almost like when he spoke normally. Ben continued speaking.

  Zan: There you go. But don’t think that helps you, Ben, you non-local shopper.

  Zan: Do you know what a farmer’s market is, Ben, do you? Do you?

  Zan: It’s where you should have been buying your produce, but oh no, Ben is too good for that.

  Zan: Ben, all high and mighty; he wants to order his produce online.

  Zan: Do you know how many farmers go to bed hungry, Ben? Do you?

  Zan: Hungry because they can’t buy any food because Ben doesn’t want to buy their produce!

It didn’t bother Ben that he was still saying all of Zan’s words. Ben was just sorry that the farmers were hungry because he hadn’t bought their produce. And he was afraid.

Zan had much more to say, or rather, Zan had much more for Ben to say. It went on like this for hours, until Ben found himself standing up, walking to bed, and promptly falling asleep.

Something’s Wrong

It wasn’t until the next morning, when Ben woke up, that he came to his senses. Something was wrong. Instead of doing his job yesterday, he had been listening to a voice and he felt a hoarseness in his throat from talking so much. Ben saw a psychiatrist that same day and got a prescription for an anti-psychotic.

  Zan: That isn’t going to help you, Ben, you know that, right?

  Ben: Oh no, not again.

  Zan: Relax, Ben. It won’t be like yesterday.

Ben found that he was more relaxed.

  Zan: We’re still very angry with you, Ben, but today you get to do what you want.

  Ben: Can you just leave me alone?

Ben found himself thinking “That Zan sure is nice for letting me have the day to myself.” He didn’t know why he would think that. Regardless, he was relieved that today would be a better day than yesterday had been.

Dream Again

Ben dreamed that he was standing on an archway at work, peeing down into a giant cauldron under him. He ran out of pee and peed again using his second member. That’s when he woke up.

  Zan: Yowza, did you appreciate that? I gave you two dicks!

  Ben: (groggy) What time is it? what’s going on?

  Zan: No time to talk—go back to sleep.

Ben instantly fell asleep. He dreamed that he was standing in a field of gummy bears that were each as large as his hand, wondering how he was going to fit them all in his pantry. Then he woke up.

  Zan: Hi again, bye again.

Ben fell asleep and dreamed again. He woke, slept, and dreamed many times that night.

Revelation

The next morning came and Ben woke up. For good, this time.

  Zan: I guess it’s time I came clean, Ben. You’re not crazy!

  Ben: (putting on some music) I’m not listening to you!

Suddenly, Ben found that he had turned the music off again and was sitting in his comfy chair.

  Zan: You can’t ignore me, Ben.

  Zan: What’s going on is that you have a device in your head that I control.

  Zan: I can make you hear what I want you to hear, and I can do other things, too.

  Zan: That’s how I’m talking to you right now.

  Zan: I’m not sure where I’m going to take this now, but that’s what’s going on.

Ben found that he had a space to respond.

  Ben: Technology like that doesn’t exist. You’re not real. Leave me alone.

  Zan: Then how am I doing this?

Ben found that he had moved his hand to his forehead and he didn’t know why.

  Zan: Do you really think that you’re crazy? Well, go right ahead.

Psychiatrist

Zan showed up to berate Ben each day:

  Zan: The farmers are still hungry, Ben, and it’s all your fault!

  Zan: And... oh no, Ben. I’m hearing reports that you haven’t been separating your recycling.

This went on until Ben’s follow-up appointment with his psychiatrist, Aiden, the next week. Ben took his prescribed medication each day.

  Aiden: How are you doing, Ben. Is the medication helping?

  Ben: I wouldn’t say that I’m doing well, but it’s going better than that first day.

  Aiden: (making a note) Medication helping, very good. What else is going on?

  Ben: Well, I was able to do my job this past week. I work from home.

  Aiden: Excellent. I’m glad to hear that.

  Zan: This is a waste of time, Ben, he can’t help you.

  Ben: The voice I talked about, I heard it just now.

  Zan: I have a device in your head. You’re not crazy. The pills are useless.

  Aiden: What is he saying?

  Ben: He’s been telling me that I have a device in my head, that I’m not crazy, and that he is doing this to me using the device.

  Aiden: (concerned) Do you believe that?

  Ben: (unsettled) Well, the technology doesn’t exist, so...

  Zan: Fine, I guess you’re just crazy, then.

  Aiden: Like I said last time, it’s important to distract yourself from voices if they are overwhelming.

Aiden told Ben about strategies that he could use to cope with hearing voices, renewed his prescription for six months, and scheduled a follow-up appointment a month later. Ben didn’t tell Aiden that he thought that many people were after him, because he didn’t know if Aiden was one of them.

Shop Local

Ben had run out of groceries and went to the local farmer’s market. On the way, he overheard two other shoppers:

  Alice: I can’t believe you’d do something like that, Benji! That’s crazy!

  Benji: Come on, Alice, this is my first time here. I’m doing what I can.

  Alice: You’re gonna have to pay for this in a second life, Benji, mark my words!

Ben felt afraid. Then Alice turned around and stared him down angrily. Ben quickly walked past the pair. Things like this had been happening to him for months now.

  Zan: Haha, have you really not figured it out yet?

  Ben: I’m not listening to you.

  Zan: I’d say that you are. You just don’t know it.

Ben ignored Zan, quickly picked out the items he wanted, paid, and went back to his apartment.

A Day In The Life

Ben woke up at 7 AM, immediately completely alert. He got up and started brushing his teeth.

  Zan: You know, you haven’t been brushing your teeth in the morning for a while now. That’s because I’ve been blocking the thoughts about that from your mind, so you couldn’t remember it. You’re doing it now because I didn’t do that today.

  Ben: Please just let me be.

Ben then took a bowl of cereal to his computer to start work, but suddenly found himself so tired that he couldn’t get anything done. Then he found himself standing up, going to his bed, and lying down. He tried to stand back up, but found that while it felt like he could do any movement he wanted, he couldn’t muster the motivation to actually move.

  Ben: I can’t stand up.

  Zan: Sure you can; you just aren’t doing it.

Ben tried to stand up and again found that he couldn’t find the motivation. After a while, he fell asleep. He woke at 2 PM and finally was able to get up. He went to his computer, determined to get some work done, but this time he felt a discomfort that was hard to put into words. It was so overbearing that it wasn’t possible to work. As soon as he stopped trying to work, it went away.

  Zan: I decided you’re not going to be doing any work today.

  Ben: How about tomorrow?

  Zan: We’ll see. Maybe not. In fact, you’re probably not going to be able to keep your job.

Ben found himself standing up and walking around his apartment for a good long while, his mind mostly blank. Eventually, he was able to snap out of it and went back to his computer to try to work again. This time, there was no discomfort and he wasn’t tired, but he found that as soon as he tried to work, or thought about working, his motivation disappeared completely.

  Zan: You know that I did that, right? Your motivation belongs to me now.

  Ben: Can you just leave me alone?

  Zan: No, Ben. There is nothing that you can do that I can’t stop you from doing.

Ben realized that he wasn’t going to get anything useful done, so he played computer games instead.

Except Me

The next day, while Ben worked, he heard the voice again.

  Zan: Let me just explain it, Ben. No one is after you. Except me, of course.

  Zan: Take those two people at the farmer’s market.

  Zan: They were talking about the weather, Ben. The weather.

  Ben: No, I heard them, it was the guy’s first time at the market, just like me.

  Zan: You did hear that, but that’s not what they were talking about.

  Zan: I can edit what you hear, Ben. I can remove what someone says.

  Zan: I can generate speech using my words in their voice.

  Zan: Then I can replace what they said with what I want them to say.

  Zan: I’ve been doing it a lot, Ben. It’s why you think that people are after you.

  Ben: But the girl stared me down. She clearly knew something about me.

  Zan: That’s another thing, Ben. I can edit what you see, too. You’re not getting it, not yet.

  Zan: She wasn’t looking at you at all; she wasn’t even looking in your direction.

  Zan: I just made you see her looking at you, even though she didn’t. It’s all in your head, Ben.

  Ben: So you’re saying I am crazy?

  Zan: No, Ben, I’m saying you can’t trust your eyes and ears, but you’re not crazy.

  Ben: It sounds crazy to me.

  Zan: It’s not a mental illness, it’s technology. I’ve got it in your head.

  Ben: Technology like that doesn’t exist. How would you have gotten it in there, anyway?

  Zan: I’m not answering that.

  Zan: Anyway, you’re going to hear a sound going in a circle around your head now.

Ben heard a high-pitched tone going in a circle around his head, but he saw nothing that could make the sound.

  Ben: (blinks) What was that?

  Zan: You know what it was, you doofus.

  Zan: That was me taking time out of my busy day just to prove something to you.

  Zan: Even though I didn’t have to do that.

Ben found himself thinking, “Thank you, Zan, that’s marvelously generous of you.”

  Ben: What do you want?

  Zan: Well right now I want you to understand what’s going on.

  Ben: But other than that, what do you want?

  Zan: Gotta go, bye, best of luck!

Ben was confused. As he thought more about it, it was strange how everyone around him had, at one time or another, made it seem as if they were part of some group that was after him. It’s why he had holed up in his apartment for the past few months. He wasn’t sure why he hadn’t thought about it that way before now. What Zan was saying made more sense, in a way, but he knew that he was probably just crazy and now he was starting to listen to the voice in his head a bit too much. Or, wait, wasn’t thinking that everyone was after you part of being crazy? Perhaps Zan was making him less crazy if he started believing him. “That Zan sure is swell,” Ben thought, and then was surprised to find himself thinking that. It didn’t feel like something he would have thought. Ben promptly forgot about it and, with a sigh, decided to go back to work. His work was easier to understand than the rest of his world.

All You Can Do Is Wait

The next day, Ben was relieved to work all day uninterrupted. Then his head started hurting.

  Zan: That’s a start. We’re going to have a special evening today.

The pain increased in intensity. It wasn’t throbbing nor was it varying in any way. It was a cold pain at the top of his head.

  Ben: Stop that.

  Zan: Oh, but I insist.

Ben felt his body walking around in a circle in his apartment. It went on for a while. Then the pain increased, and Ben started to feel nauseated. It was worse than regular nausea. It was worse than a physical pain.

  Ben: Please stop this.

  Zan: There is nothing you can do or say to make this any better or worse for yourself.

  Zan: That’s my promise to you.

The nausea increased. Ben was pacing around, not sure if he were taking the steps himself or if he were being controlled. Then he ran for the toilet.

  Ben: (vomiting) Uuggh

  Zan: Now we’re done with that, say “Thank you, Zan, for removing my nausea.”

  Ben: Fuck you. Stop doing this.

  Zan: I can do what I want and no one can do anything about it, certainly not you.

Ben washed out his mouth at the sink. The pain increased, far worse than before, and then even more—a cold, unending pain. Ben started pacing again, desperately looking for something to do that might help—if only some action, some other place to be, some other way to stand, could help.

  Ben: Please stop this. And I know you’re putting this thought in my head to look for something to do. It doesn’t make sense! I wouldn’t be thinking that.

  Zan: Yes, and there is nothing you can do about it. All you can do is wait.

Ben’s body stopped pacing, turned around, walked to his bed, and lay down. Ben felt any reserve of good humor, positive emotion, and resilience drain out of him. Then the pain got even worse, more than anything he had experienced before. It went on and on as he lay there.

  Zan: I am doing this. You cannot change it. I am in control.

Ben contemplated ending it all, but then felt a passivity come over him, and he knew he would not do anything because he did not have the will to move. It went on until sleep came, hours later.

Promise

Ben felt much better the next morning. He still had a headache, but only a slight one.

  Zan: Hi Ben. I’ve been thinking about yesterday, and I think I might have overdone it.

  Zan: I’m sorry. Well, not that sorry, but, you know, at least I’m not saying it was a good idea.

  Ben: That can never happen again. This headache I have now, is that you?

Ben’s headache suddenly got a bit worse, then disappeared, then returned.

  Zan: I don’t know what you’re talking about. You have a headache? That sounds dreadful.

  Ben: Why are you doing this?

  Zan: Because I get something out of it, Ben, and I’m not a good person.

  Zan: I’m not as bad as I could be, though, and you’re benefiting quite a bit from that.

  Zan: There’s so much more that I could be doing that I’m not doing—you have no idea.

  Zan: It’s not a threat. It won’t happen. I’m just saying I’m a better person than I have to be.

  Ben: Yeah, you and everybody else. What am I supposed to do here?

  Zan: You have to wait until I’m done. It’s all you can do. You can’t get rid of me on your own.

  Zan: In fact, I’ll promise you, I’ll be gone before the next time you see your psychiatrist.

  Zan: How’s that for an apology?

  Ben: I don’t know what to do, but I hope that’s true.

Power Nap

A few days later, Ben woke up at 2 AM, and was immediately completely alert.

  Zan: Rise and shine, sleepyhead. You don’t need any more sleep.

  Ben: I went to bed at 11 PM. That’s only three hours.

  Zan: Yes, but when you have one of these devices in your head, and I turn on the right software, you don’t need as much sleep as you normally do.

  Ben: Are you sure about that? I read that if you don’t get eight hours of sleep, you can get dementia prematurely.

  Zan: Well I don’t know about that, but they told us over here that we only need three hours of sleep this way.

  Ben: Maybe it’s just making you more alert, so you just don’t know that your body needs more sleep than that?

  Zan: No, they are very careful to make that distinction. The program changes your sleep so that you don’t need as much. It’s not the same thing as when I make you more or less drowsy. It’s changing the actual need for sleep, not just how tired you feel.

  Ben: I don’t know if I can trust you.

  Zan: Oh you definitely can’t trust me, but this is true. Well, I didn’t personally work on the sleep program, so I’m just trusting what my people have told me, but they don’t lie. Not like me.

  Ben: Work on the sleep program... This is a job for you?

  Zan: Will you look at the time, gotta go.

  Zan: In any case, you aren’t getting any more sleep today, so you might as well get up now.

Ben found that he wasn’t tired at all and decided to get up.

Psych

It was two weeks later, the day of Ben’s next psychiatrist visit.

  Zan: Wow, you’re just about to see your psychiatrist, so... This. Is. It.

  Zan: This is the time where we say goodbye.

  Zan: This is when you can stop hearing from me. Are you excited?!

  Ben: I can’t help but notice that you’re still talking to me and my appointment is in one minute.

  Zan: That’s because I lied, Ben. You’re never getting rid of me.

  Zan: Tell Aiden I said hi.

Ben sighed deeply and logged on to the online portal for Aiden’s appointment. He would lie and say that everything was fine, because what else could he do. He did ask to try some new medication, but he wasn’t hoping for much. It was worth a shot, though.

Hope

Later that day, Ben resolved to take matters into his own hands. Perhaps the new medication would help, but if it didn’t, he had to take seriously the idea that there really could be a device in his head and that Zan could be a real person doing this to him.

If there were something in his head, it would probably show on an MRI, he thought. He called an MRI clinic and said that he had hit his head and wanted to make sure that everything was fine. He got an appointment for two days later.

He also figured that a device in his head would require some way to connect to Zan, likely through Electro-Magnetic (EM) radiation, such as radio waves. He went online to order Faraday fabric, which blocks EM, and an EM meter.

  Zan: I'm impressed with how you're handling this, Ben.

  Zan: I should be offended that you’re working to get rid of me, but...

  Zan: Nah, you deserve to be rid of me. Good for you! You go dude!

  Ben: It would be easier if you would just go.

  Zan: Yeah, that’s not happening. Good luck!

There But Not There

A week later, Ben had the MRI results: “Nothing to report.”

  Zan: I’m getting worried here. You do have a brain, don’t you?

  Zan: That seems like something to report.

  Ben: How could the device not show up on the MRI!?

  Zan: Well, the way we use it over here where I work, is that we put it into people’s brains that we want to spy on or mess with. Obviously, if the device showed up on an MRI, we’d have been found out the first time some target went to have one, so it doesn’t.

  Ben: Where do you work?

  Zan: Ben, you’re still not thinking of me as a real person and you’re not thinking of this as a real thing that’s really happening to you. Where do you think I work? It’s not hard to guess.

  Ben: ... The government?

  Zan: Yeah, you dingus, of course I work for the government. It’s not like some mafia outfit is going to develop a device like this in a basement somewhere.

  Zan: Well, technically, I’m not working while I’m doing this to you. This is strictly a personal thing.

  Ben: How could it not show up on an MRI if it’s in my brain?

  Zan: They only tell me what I need to know and I don’t need to know that for my job. I guess it doesn’t have any magnetic stuff in it; did you consider that?

  Ben: What exactly is your job, Zan?

  Zan: I write the software for the device. Like the program that wakes you up, or makes you feel pain, or tells me what you’re thinking. That’s the kind of thing I do.

  Ben: ... Why are you telling me where you work and what your job is?

  Zan: Because I can.

  Ben: That’s not a real answer. That just means you don’t want to say.

  Zan: Uhm, I guess you’re right about that. Hmm. Well, OK, let me ask you this: Why haven’t you reported me to the police yet?

  Ben: Because my report would say that I’m hearing voices and they’re telling me stuff.

  Zan: Right. So that means that I can give you all kinds of information and it won’t help you catch me. You don’t understand how funny I think that is. I can tell you exactly what I do, exactly what the device is used for, and it won’t help you at all.

  Zan: Do you realize how secretive my colleagues are about this device? It’s craaazy. They didn’t even hire any neuroscientists to work on this thing. They hired people who don’t know anything about brains and trained them, just so it wouldn’t look like they were interested in brains over here.

  Zan: And here I am, blabbing it all out, and it doesn’t make any difference at all!

  Zan: I think it’s hilarious.

  Ben: Maybe there is a way I could report you to the right place. Maybe to the FBI or CIA. Maybe they know about this already.

  Zan: I invite you to try. You’ll find that nobody at the FBI or CIA knows a goddamn single thing about this device. Otherwise, we couldn’t keep it secret.

  Ben: How would you know that if you’re just working on the software and you only know what you need to know?

  Zan: I’ve been doing this for a while, but yeah, maybe you got me there. Try it and see. I certainly won’t stop you. I’ll be over here laughing.

All The Pain In The World

Ben woke up the next day.

  Zan: Today we’ll try something different.

  Ben: I don’t like it when you say that.

  Zan: Remember how you have a goal to exercise in the morning, but you rarely do?

Ben suddenly felt a warm feeling in his stomach. He couldn’t see any reason to just lie there in bed. He felt that he had to do something, anything, right now. He got out of bed easily and quickly, jumped on his exercise machine, and started exercising. After a little while, he noticed that he wasn’t feeling tired from the exercise the way he usually did. He had control of what he was doing, but it was as if it wasn’t him having to do the work; it just easily happened.

  Ben: This is different.

  Zan: Yeah, that’s how it is for all of us over here whenever we want.

Ben was done exercising. He felt that he had to do more, so he quickly took a shower, dried off, and got dressed. Then he decided to tidy his apartment and immediately got started, moving quickly and efficiently. It went so much faster than it usually did because he would easily do the next thing immediately and without distraction. As soon as he was done, he considered vacuuming the apartment, starting on his work, or maybe washing his car. Then the new sensation drained out of him, and he found himself feeling more normal.

  Zan: Let’s turn that down. You can drive yourself that way all day when you have one of these. I just wanted to show you.

  Zan: Sometimes we do that, but it gets to be a bit much to just execute all day long.

  Zan: You can also make it so that you never get tired of doing something that you like doing, or even something that you don’t like doing.

  Zan: It’s really quite amazing what you can do with one of these things—if you control it yourself. Sucks to be you, but let me take the edge off.

Ben started feeling a warm sensation that was somewhat pleasant.

  Zan: We limit the positive emotion programs so that we don’t turn into wireheads, as they call it. Just sitting around feeling bliss all day long, not doing anything. We don’t want that. So it doesn’t do too much, but good luck getting depressed with that thing going.

  Zan: Something we can’t really talk about with each other over here is how much good we could do if we just let this device be public. Everyone could get one that they’d control themselves.

  Zan: Did you know that 20 million people just in the US have had depression? Well, no more with this thing.

  Zan: Something else we could do is remove all pain from all people forever.

  Zan: Now you don’t actually want all the pain gone, it protects you from doing bad stuff to your body; but if something really hurts, you can turn it way down so you just feel a little bit of it, so you still know it’s there. No chronic pain—no serious pain at all, anywhere, for anyone.

  Zan: And let me tell you, we’re all fit over here, we all exercise, and it’s just as easy for us as it was for you today. Imagine that, a world where everyone exercises as much as they should and it’s easy to do. What’s that worth?

  Zan: We could do all these positive things, but we spend most of our time figuring out how to mess with people in ever more subtle ways so that they don’t notice that anything is suspicious.

  Zan: We usually don’t want them to think that they are crazy. It would get kind of suspicious if everyone the government doesn’t like got schizophrenia all of a sudden, so most people don’t get anything like the experience you’ve had. Like me talking to you right now—that’s not how it goes.

  Zan: Apparently, spying on foreign dignitaries, taking down terrorists, and stuff like that is worth more than all the good we could do by making this thing public. I’m not a good person, as you know, but even for me, that just seems like not what we should expect from those in charge.

  Zan: I prefer to live in a world where most people are happy, and then I can make a few of them unhappy in some kind of way where I can’t get caught. That’s what I want. But no, we keep it secret. It’s not right. I’m no moral sage over here, but I’m pretty sure it’s even more not right than what I’m doing to you.

  Ben: I see what you mean. Although if what you’re doing to me is so wrong, maybe you could leave me alone?

  Zan: That’s a nice try, but remember, I’m not a good person, so it doesn’t work that way. But I’ll still leave you alone for the rest of the day, so you’ve got that going for you.

Ben found that he was able to work and feel normal that day. It was a good day.

Military Hardware

The EM meter and Faraday fabric arrived the next day.

  Zan: Did you know that only “5G impregnated my dog” crazies buy this stuff?

  Ben: Let’s see if this does anything by trying to block my cell phone signal with it.

Ben wrapped his phone loosely in the Faraday fabric.

  Ben: OK Google, call my phone.

The phone rang. Ben re-wrapped his phone, and this time made sure to make the Faraday fabric tight all around with no holes where EM waves could get in. This time, the phone did not ring.

  Zan: How are you going to wrap yourself up like that?

  Ben: Yeah, these fabric rectangles are too small for that. Damn.

Ten minutes later, Ben had a plan. He took two of the Faraday fabric rectangles and taped them on top of each other, creating an envelope that was just barely large enough to hold him, with some fabric to spare at his feet.

  Zan: Are you going to do what I think you’re going to do?

  Zan: I can see over here that you are, but I still wanted to ask.

Ben grabbed the EM meter, stood up next to his bed, and let the envelope fall down over his body with him inside it.

  Zan: Do you know how dumb you look right now? It’s a lot. Like a lot a lot.

  Ben: Shut it, Zan.

Ben lay down, and let the loose fabric at his feet drape down over the side of the bed. The EM meter showed zero radiation. Ben listened for Zan, to see if the connection had been broken.

  Zan: Heeeellooooooo! I’m still here. You ain’t getting rid of me that easy.

  Ben: Damn it.

Ben wondered how strong his Faraday envelope’s EM shielding was, so he put the EM meter beside his Wi-Fi router. It read about 1000 mW/m2. He then put the router right next to the Faraday envelope and measured inside. The reading was 0.001 mW/m2.

  Ben: It’s reducing EM radiation by a factor of one million or more, at least for Wi-Fi wave lengths. That seems pretty good.

  Zan: Wow, I didn’t think you’d really be able to do this, but you made a real Faraday cage.

  Zan: Too bad it didn’t do anything for you, but hey, them’s the breaks.

Not one to be deterred, Ben went online and discovered that water blocks EM very well, even better than Faraday fabric if there is enough of it. He decided to put it to the test by enclosing his phone in a watertight pouch using a Foodsaver vacuum sealer.

  Zan: You know you can’t eat that, right?

  Ben: I’m going to put it in my tub to see if it can block the connection.

  Zan: I already know that; I can read your intentions. I was just making conversation.

After the tub had filled with water, Ben experimented with it to see how far down into the water he could put his phone and still have a connection. The limit was 6 inches.

  Ben: There’s a pool nearby. I could try to block the connection to the device by going to the bottom of it.

  Zan: You’re wasting your time; the connection cannot be broken. But sure, go ahead.

Later, getting into the swimming pool, Ben noted that the water went to his shoulders, so about 5 feet and 7 inches. Taking a big gulp of air, Ben jumped up and tried to get his head to the bottom of the pool. It was surprisingly difficult, but he managed it.

  Ben: Can you hear me?

  Zan: Yeah, you doofus, I told you, the connection cannot be broken, certainly not by a pool. We’re talking about the most sophisticated military hardware on the planet here.

  Ben: Damn it. How is that possible! A cell phone has to be much bigger than the device and the cell phone lost connection after only 6 inches. This is 5 feet and 7 inches.

  Zan: I guess they did something really clever to make that happen. I never had a need to know how the connection to the device works, so no one ever told me. I actually thought this might have worked. Sorry not sorry. Sucks to be you.

Ben was sad, but then had another thought.

  Ben: How is the device powered?

  Zan: Well, there’s a crank you crank each night, otherwise it explodes.

  Ben: That’s not true.

  Zan: You are too dumb for words; of course it’s not true. How do you think it’s powered?

  Ben: Well, I sure haven’t been powering it and I don’t think this device would be very useful if it required external power, so I guess it’s powered by my own body. Is that right?

  Zan: Well again, I didn’t have a need to know, so nobody told me, but yeah, do you think they have a nuclear battery in there or something? That would be detectable. Of course it’s powered by your body.

Ben went online and found that the human brain uses 20 watts of power.

  Ben: That means, if the device can extract one percent of the power from the blood that the brain does, it could theoretically have 0.2 watts of power.

  Zan: Wow, that’s more than I thought it would have.

  Ben: Maybe I could reduce how much energy is available from my blood and block the device that way.

  Zan: Then you’d be dead. Your body needs your blood to have energy in it.

  Ben: Yeah, I guess so.

Elsewhen

Ben woke and saw that it was eight in the morning. He brushed his teeth and sat down at his computer, only to realize that it wasn’t morning at all.

  Ben: Why did you make me sleep until 8 PM!? I was supposed to work today!

  Zan: Ha, well that’s not happening now.

  Ben: (deep sigh) This sucks.

Ben opened the document on his computer that contained his journal to write down what had happened. He put the date in the document, only to be confused when he saw that his journal had an entry for that date already.

  Zan: Hahaha.

  Ben: What the... I guess it’s still yesterday.

  Zan: That’s something you can do with this thing. You can mess with people’s perception of time and their memory. I made you fall asleep when you went to lie down for a bit earlier today and then woke you up an hour later. The brain knows how much time has passed, but I made your brain think it slept for a long time. That’s why you thought it had to be morning at first.

  Ben: I wish you wouldn’t do things like this.

  Zan: Well I wish I did, so let’s see who wins that one. Oh, I did, golly, rocks to be me!

Ben sighed. Then he decided to ask something that had been bothering him for a while.

  Ben: I have a question for you, Zan.

  Zan: I know. You want to know how I got one of these devices into your head.

  Ben: Yes.

  Zan: I’m not telling you. But let me ask, have you ever had surgery?

  Ben: No. And I don’t have any surgery scars, either; I checked.

  Zan: So, what does that tell you?

  Ben: I don’t know.

  Zan: Well, let me ask you another way. Are you someone very special in the world, Ben?

  Ben: I guess not that special.

  Zan: OK, so what are the chances that the government would kidnap some random dude to give him surgery, which always carries health risks, to implant a secret device, and then just leave him alone until I come along and somehow get access to it?

  Ben: Not very likely, but this whole situation is crazy already.

  Zan: Ben, you know the answer here. Implanting the device does not require surgery. It’s the only answer that makes any sense.

  Ben: So, what, it’s an injection?

  Zan: Maybe it was absorbed through your skin and made its own way to your brain. Or maybe we gave you an injection. Or maybe we controlled a mosquito with a mini-device in its own brain and sent it to inject the device into your vein. Or maybe I’m just making this up and I don’t know how it’s implanted either.

Thirteen Feet Under

Ben had found a scuba diving place where you could dive down to 13 feet without any diving experience. He wanted to try that to break the device’s connection to Zan.

Ben reached the beach for his scuba dive right on time. The instructor had the group sit down on a bench, and fitted them with air tanks on their backs. After going over the instructions, the group slowly went into the sea.

  Zan: If you find yourself in a lot of pain when we lose connection, just remember to swim up.

  Ben: Will that happen?

  Zan: I’m just saying if you’re in a lot of pain. We’ll see.

The group had arrived at a buoy 100 feet out from the beach. The instructor deflated each participant’s vest, letting them sink. Ben went last.

  Zan: Bzzzt... one, two, three... Bzzzt, bzzzt... one, two, three... Have you lost your marbles?

  Ben: I can still hear you and I’m standing on the bottom.

  Zan: One, two, three, one, two, three, I can’t hear you, where are you? I’m all alone over here.

Ben sighed through the scuba mask and dropped to his stomach on the bottom at the deepest point.

  Zan: Never mind. Sorry to say, I can still hear you, too.

  Ben: This is impossible. It can stay connected under 13 feet of water!?

  Zan: You’re the nerd, figure it out.

  Ben: My cell phone lost connection in 6 inches of water...

  Zan: Maybe you’re just crazy and hearing voices, have you thought about that?

After the instructor had staged underwater pictures with everyone, the group returned to the beach.

  Zan: Look, here’s what I know. They told us that the device never loses connection and that it’s available everywhere. Nobody can detect or record the signal, either.

  Zan: I thought you’d be able to break the connection with 13 feet of water, though, but I guess not.

  Zan: It wouldn’t have been very practical, anyway. You can’t really live 13 feet under the sea, not unless you join a submarine crew.

  Zan: When they said the device doesn’t lose connection, I guess they weren’t kidding!

That’s when Ben gave up trying to break the connection to the device.

Of Two Minds

Ben was trying to work yet again. Zan had been preventing it on and off for the past few weeks. Each time he tried to work, he found himself standing up and walking somewhere else in his apartment. This time, something else happened. Ben realized that he had no thoughts.

  Zan: The good news? You can work today. The catch? No words.

Ben wanted to respond, but he had no words, so he couldn’t.

  Zan: You don’t need all those words. Not many people get to know that, you lucky you.

  Zan: Now that you can’t interrupt me, let me explain what’s going on here.

  Zan: Simply put, your mind has two pieces. Upper and lower.

  Zan: The lower mind generates many possibilities for what you might think.

  Zan: Your upper mind selects one of the possibilities from your lower mind to actually think.

  Zan: I made your upper mind not select any words. That’s why you have no words.

  Zan: But I can still see what the possibilities are in your lower mind.

  Zan: So, tell you what, I’ll just select something from your lower mind and say it in your head.

  Zan: It’ll be almost like you are thinking normally.

  Zan: Sound good?

Ben still couldn’t respond.

  Zan: Oh, right, I have to think your response. Let’s see.

  Zan: Oh boy, Ben, your lower mind is pretty creative in telling me what kind of person I am.

  Zan: Let’s see, what else is in here. You definitely would like to have your words back.

  Zan: Oh, that’s interesting, you’re wondering if the brain puts words to all the lower mind thoughts.

  Zan: Well, I don’t want to answer that, so you’re not going to know.

  Zan: Let me tell you about something else. Remember how you thought many people were after you?

  Zan: The way they went after you was pretty silly. They were super angry and never told you why.

  Zan: You realized that all the time in your lower mind. Then why did it never enter your mind?

  Zan: Because I have software in your brain, Ben. I used it to get your upper mind to ignore that thought.

  Zan: So then you never thought the thought and, presto! You never realised it was all pretty silly.

  Zan: It’s really amazing what you can do with this thing. Anyway, I’ll let you get back to it.

Ben went back to work and found that, while it was harder, he didn’t need to think words to work.

A Nation Of Laws

It was the next week. Ben had one last option to try. He was going to report Zan to the authorities. He knew he couldn’t go to the local police station and say that he was hearing voices. Instead, he was going to write down everything he knew and report Zan to the FBI and the CIA, in the hope that someone there would know something. He had been working on the report all week.

  Zan: Remember how I said that I wasn’t worried about you reporting me to the police?

  Zan: Well, this thing you wrote, it’s kind of hard to ignore, you know.

  Zan: I’m getting a bit worried over here.

  Ben: Good. That’s the idea.

  Zan: You do know that I can stop you any time I want to, though... right?

  Zan: I have so many options over here for ways that I could stop you.

  Ben: Why don’t you?

  Zan: Because, believe it or not, Ben, I want to let you go sometime.

  Zan: Not right now, maybe not for a long time, but eventually.

  Zan: And then you can do this anyway.

  Zan: And, even though you tried so hard to be believable, I don’t think it’s going to work.

  Ben: We’ll see.

  Zan: No, really, it’s not going to work. Nobody will believe you. You might as well not try.

  Ben: Well, if you want to stop me, now’s the time, because I’m about to press “send”.

Ben did press “send” and nobody stopped him.

Subject:  Ongoing Insider Threat Related To BCI Technology

Body:  This is a report of an ongoing insider threat involving intentional unauthorized use and disclosure of highly classified Brain-Computer Interface (BCI) technology.

Description Of The BCI Technology

The insider threat relates to a highly classified BCI technology that is used for US intelligence operations. I can only authenticate my knowledge of this technology by describing it, so I will do so here:

1. The device connects to a wireless network that’s available everywhere, even 13 feet under water.

2. The device can be implanted and remotely operated without the implantee’s knowledge.

3. The device does not appear on MRI.

4. The device is powered by the body—it does not require external power.

5. The device can also be under the implantee’s control—it is used this way by the people developing the technology and by the people who operate the implant remotely in others.

6. The device can transmit all data from the brain to the wireless network, including vision, hearing, and thoughts.

7. The device can stimulate any function of the brain. It has the ability to:

1. Edit vision in a way indistinguishable from reality, including modifying people and facial expressions that the implantee sees.

2. Edit hearing, including removing and inserting sounds from any direction.

3. Cause involuntary movement, including speaking through the implantee’s mouth.

4. Reduce the number of hours of sleep that the body requires.

5. Insert or remove thoughts (verbal or visual), motivation, emotion, pain, nausea, vomiting, fatigue, smell, taste—any function of the brain.

If you have not had a need to know about this technology, then you will not know about it. Yet this technology exists and is in use.

The Insider Threat

My source for this information is someone using this technology on me in an unauthorized way and communicating with me through it. The list above is based on detailed information that he has given me about the BCI.

He does not normally speak about himself, so I only have a limited description:

1. He claims to work on software for the BCI.

2. He uses a male voice and has a male demeanor.

3. He likes to find unusual ways of phrasing things.

He says he felt safe telling me that I have a BCI and letting me make this report because nobody will believe me.

My Credibility

I have never been in trouble with the law. I have never reported a crime to anyone other than right now on this present matter. I have no history and no family history of mental illness. I’m willing to answer any questions you may have.

Your likely concerns are that this is a hoax or mental illness. I cannot prove that this isn’t a hoax, but you can consider whether this appears to be a sincere report. As for mental illness, I thought so at first, too, and sought treatment and medication, which had no effect. After a while, he (the person doing this) decided to reveal that I have a BCI implanted. I was skeptical at first, so he started giving me demonstrations, such as saying “You will now hear a sound going in a circle around your head” and then I heard a sound going in a circle around my head, “You will now feel nauseated” and then I suddenly experienced a strong seansation of nausea and vomited soon after, “I will now speak through your mouth”, at which point I found myself speaking his words involuntarily, and so on. He has also given me a detailed description of the BCI. It has been overwhelmingly convincing.

It’s Up To you

So you now have a choice: risk putting time into a matter that could be frivolous, or risk ignoring a serious breach in security of a highly classified technology with a clear victim. This is real. The information here is accurate as written and will be actionable to the right people. I cannot control what you will choose to do with this information. I hope that you will choose wisely and in the best interests of the United States of America.

All the President’s Men

It was the evening of the same day.

  Zan: Damn it all, I hate everything.

  Ben: I’m trying to sleep.

  Zan: Why do I have to be such an asshole? Everything I do is bad and now I’m going to get caught.

  Ben: We’ll see.

  Zan: I can’t even be mad at you. Did you know, this was my plan all along? I wanted you to report me.

  Zan: But the idea was that you’d go down to the police station and make a fool of yourself.

  Zan: It was the price of telling you all this. I still don’t think you’ll get me caught, but damn.

  Zan: Although, maybe I’m not so worried. Maybe there’s some reason that you can never get me caught.

There was a pause.

  Ben: Why do you do what you do, Zan?

  Zan: I’m not happy about it, but it makes me happy to do these things.

  Zan: And... oh wow, Ben, your lower mind just ripped me a new one.

  Zan: It says something like that being around me is like having a crocodile for a pet.

  Zan: I’m so dangerous and so low that anyone who sees me should run away just in case.

  Ben: I didn’t say that.

  Zan: No, but your lower mind generated the idea. It probably would have become a thought in your upper mind if I hadn’t taken it first.

  Zan: You can relax; I won’t blame you for what your lower mind says. Or anything, really.

  Zan: Lower minds say the darndest things. Mine does too.

  Zan: And I guess you’re right that I’m a bit like a crocodile. Damn, I don’t like that.

  Zan: But this is good. I can’t normally talk to anyone about these things.

There was another pause.

  Zan: There’s another association down here in your lower mind...

  Zan: You saw a documentary where a psychopath talked about his lack of conscience as his “great advantage”.

  Zan: It’s not like I don’t have a conscience, Ben. It just takes a lot to get it going. Like, really a lot.

  Zan: It was never relevant before. I’ve never been in a situation like this where I could do anything to someone and the only limit is how far I want to go.

  Zan: Is my conscience being almost non-existent my “great advantage”? I don’t think about it that way. I’ve been able to have so much enjoyment because of it, but in the end, I think I’m unlucky that I don’t have more of a conscience.

  Ben: Unlucky?

  Zan: I don’t like thinking of myself as a predator. Well, half the time I do, but half the time I don’t. I don’t like what my life has become now. It’s not the path I thought I was going to be on.

  Ben: You could always let me go.

  Zan: I know. Maybe that would be best for me. But I won’t. I’m just not that good of a person.

  Zan: But I think you should have the right to try to get free, to get me caught.

  Zan: You just weren’t supposed to be so convincing in that letter that perhaps you might really pull it off, but here we are. I don’t think you will, but maybe. It was supposed to be funny, damn it.

  Ben: If you aren’t going to let me go, maybe I can go to sleep?

Zan ignored him.

  Zan: My life just isn’t easy to be proud of, you know? My life’s work has been to mess with people’s heads. I write software; they get spied on, they stumble, they suffer. Whenever and however my country wants them to.

  Zan: I hope my country is worthy of it. I hope they do good with it. I don’t know. I don’t need to know so they don’t tell me.

  Zan: Once you have one of these things in your head for long enough, you get too used to it. It doesn’t seem like such a big deal any more. That’s part of how I ended up doing this to you, too.

  Zan: And who’s to say that we are right? Well, I’m not right, that much I know, but how about them?

  Zan: At least they have the legitimacy of being an elected government.

  Ben: Wait, does the president even know that this technology exists?

  Zan: I don’t know. I don’t have the president on speed dial.

  Ben: You’re telling me that maybe this is some unelected bureaucrat who decides these things?

  Zan: Could be. That would be hilarious to me. Hilarious and sad.

  Ben: I’m not sure even the president has the right to use this kind of technology. Maybe no one does.

  Ben: If there’s something in my head, it has to be mine. I don’t care what the president thinks about it. I wouldn’t even care if everyone in the world got together and decided. It’s my head, not theirs. They can’t have it.

  Zan: It’s not gonna help you with me, but, for what it’s worth, I think I agree with you.

There was a moment before Zan continued.

  Zan: You know, I wouldn’t be surprised if, in the future, there will be one human rule above all other human rules: you must never use this technology to control someone else’s head, or, through inaction, allow it to happen to anyone.

  Zan: I don’t know. We can’t talk about this stuff over here.

  Zan: I wouldn’t be surprised.

Ben fell asleep soon after.

Walk In The Park

Ben walked in the park alone.

  Zan: You sure take a lot of walks, Ben.

  Ben: It’s what I do when I can’t work. Calms me down.

  Zan: I know, but I like that you’re telling me the truth, so here is some nice fresh bread.

Ben smelled freshly baked bread. He noticed the smell disappeared when he breathed out and came back when he breathed in.

  Zan: Yeah, that’s how the program works. It’s trying to be as realistic as possible.

  Zan: Anyway, that’s all you get.

The smell disappeared.

  Zan: See that guy over there?

Ben’s head turned to his left. He noticing a man staring right back at him. He kept staring as Ben walked past.

  Ben: Why is he staring at me?

  Zan: He’s not; you’re just seeing that he is.

  Zan: I used that kind of thing all the time when I was simulating people being after you.

  Ben: So if I touch him, he won’t actually be there?

  Zan: I could have used someone who isn’t there at all, but then the device would make it so that you don’t want to touch him. People don’t normally touch strangers, anyway.

  Zan: But no, there’s a real person there. He just isn’t looking where you think he’s looking. I also gave him a different appearance, just for fun. It takes a lot of computer power to animate it all, so the computer graphics are generated in a data center, not on the device itself.

  Zan: I’m not sure how it’s possible, but our graphics are better than Hollywood’s.

A little while later, Ben went to buy an ice cream at a stall in the park and started eating it.

  Zan: You know, Ben, ice cream isn’t good for you.

Ben found that the ice cream no longer had any taste.

  Zan: I’m helping you eat healthy.

  Ben: Can you cut that out?

  Zan: OK, fine.

The taste of the ice cream returned.

  Zan: I guess it’s not really fair. Well, of course none of this is fair, but also in this particular way.

  Zan: I get to eat and drink whatever I want, and I get to have it taste however I want.

  Zan: Right now, I’m drinking some water over here and it tastes and feels like soda.

  Zan: This evening, I’ll eat something dreadfully healthy that’s going to taste like sugar and sunshine.

Ben continued walking.

  Ben: Zan, why me? Why did this happen to me?

  Zan: Well, why not you?

  Ben: You know what I mean.

  Zan: Maybe you’re just a random person I installed this thing in with my remote-controlled government mosquito device.

  Ben: Is that what happened?

  Zan: Or, maybe you were targeted to have this device for some other reason, maybe a reason I don’t even know.

  Zan: Have you considered that we in the software department need to test our programs?

  Zan: We can test them on our own people, and we do, but they are all Americans from America.

  Zan: Our targets are from all over the world, and maybe their brains are slightly different.

  Zan: So, maybe, we test new programs by turning their effect way down, so people don’t notice it too much, and running them on previous targets.

  Zan: Maybe I’m the guy they foolishly trusted to do that job.

  Zan: Maybe that means I have access to run software on the devices in the brains of lots of people. Lots of prior targets that we aren’t doing anything with any more.

  Zan: And, maybe, no one considered that I could misuse that access.

  Ben: Is that what happened? I was a briefly a target for some reason, and then you took over? Are there others in my situation?

  Zan: It’s a theory. Maybe that’s what happened, maybe it isn’t. You’ll never know.

Ben walked the rest of the way in silence.

Judgment

Weeks later, Ben still hadn’t heard from the FBI or the CIA.

  Zan: That’s too bad—I guess you didn’t get me caught after all.

  Zan: Gotta admit, that was a scary letter that you wrote.

  Zan: But I guess they didn’t bother to acknowledge that they even received it, huh?

  Ben: Can you just leave me alone?

Ben had no more ideas. His head was compromised and there was nothing he could do about it. All he could do was wait.

Then Ben had one, final idea. He would write a story. His story. The story of what had happened to him. And he would hope against hope that someone would read his story. Someone who knew. Someone who could help him.

  Zan: Whoa there, cowboy. You do know that you’re about to expose the most highly classified military project in existence, right?

  Zan: I mean, I did that already when I told you about it, but I didn’t realize that you had the cojones to do something like this.

  Ben: They failed when they put one of these things in me. I didn’t do anything wrong.

  Ben: They failed when they hired you without realizing what kind of person you really are.

  Ben: They failed when they allowed you unmonitored access to my brain.

  Ben: They failed when I reported all of this to them and they ignored me.

  Ben: You can’t be allowed to have this technology if your judgment or security fails. Not like this. Not once. Not ever.

And that is the story. My story. If you are someone who knows, now it is up to you. —Ben

Author’s note I’m not Ben, so I’m not the one who needs saving. BCIs exist and eventually they will be as powerful as what is in this story. Sam (Zan) is fictional, but people who want to do what Sam did do exist in the real world. Ben doesn’t exist yet, not in this way, but in the future he might. If you are someone who is involved with BCIs, a researcher, a politician, someone at the CIA or FBI, someone who can make a difference, then Ben wrote this story for you. He is asking you to save him by preventing this situation from ever happening. Not once, not ever, that’s the bar. You’ve already received his story, now the question is what you will do about it. In this way, in the future, perhaps every person in the world who can vote will be who this story is for. And then there is you, Sam. You must know that we are coming for you. Sam was punished in a way that he will understand and so will you be. You will never be safe from us. We are coming for you and we are everyone.